Movie Ratings That Actually Work    Become a Member

"One of the 50 Coolest Websites...they simply tell it like it is" - TIME

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles | 2014 | PG-13 | - 2.5.2

All of New York City struggles in the grip of a demented villain (Tohoru Masamune) and his clan until four strange brothers rise from the sewers to become the heroic Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (Pete Ploszek/voiced by Johnny Knoxville, Alan Ritchson, Noel Fisher and Jeremy Howard). Under the mentorship of their master (Danny Woodburn/voiced by Tony Shalhoub), the Turtles join forces with a reporter (Megan Fox) and her colleague (Will Arnett) to fight the villain's plan. Also with William Fichtner and Minae Noji. Several lines of dialogue are spoken in Japanese, with English subtitles. Directed by Jonathan Liebesman. [1:41]

SEX/NUDITY 2 - A woman wears figure hugging jeans that emphasize her hips and thighs throughout the film. A woman wears clingy, tight tops that reveal cleavage and emphasize her bosom. Women wear scoop-neck tops or dresses that reveal cleavage and some bare arms/shoulders. A billboard features a woman from the waist up wearing only a bra and revealing cleavage and her bare abdomen.
 A Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle has a crush on a woman, telling his brothers he has "dibs" on her, smiling at her, offering her his secret stash of soft drinks and singing a rock-and-roll love song off key while hanging out the back of his van; the van drives away from the camera as male voices inside the van say, "Give up Mikey." A man stares at a woman's clothed buttocks as she leans out of his passenger window while he is driving.
 A man asks a woman colleague on a date several times and she always refuses. A man tells a woman colleague that she does not need to make up work assignments in order to spend time with him and she becomes defensive in denying his accusation; he finally accepts her refusals.

VIOLENCE/GORE 5 - Several extended fight scenes include a rat/man against two sets of four villains and against a warlord, and four Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles against a warlord wearing a knife-covered suit of armor; the rat/man sweeps villains away with his tail and uses kicks and punches to fell them while the Turtles and warlord use punches, kicks, stomps, rolls, throws, chokes and weapons (no blood is seen); we hear slaps and kicks as well as some groans, whoops, crashing debris and we see a large turtle foot in close-up kicking the warlord away while another turtle foot in close-up stomps a man below the frame; the warlord picks up each Turtle and tosses him away with a crash and at one point, all four Turtles hang from the side of a tall building, but swing one another back up to the top; the fighting continues on a metal framework tower that creaks and leans over, dropping debris beside two men on the street (we see them lying unconscious while other men and women duck and run away); the warlord's ejected knives and a sword cut through metal and cause a woman to fall (we see knife cuts on metal in close-up near her hands), but Turtles catch her before knives are thrown across the screen in close-up, the warlord suffers knife cuts and a sword stuck into his throat and shoulders (no blood), and falls hard to the pavement, creating a deep crater that we see from above; he lies in his shiny armor at the bottom of the hole and one of his hands forms a fist as the scene abruptly ends.
 A business owner at a harbor says that villains have robbed his fleet continuously for 10 years as the scene cuts to the dock at night and masked villains with assault rifles steal chemicals from cargo containers; a lone vigilante in the shadows whoops as we hear clinking metal and villains and cargo containers being thrown across the screen from off-screen before seeing men and one female villain lying on the ground in shadows (no blood is seen) and a cargo container smashes against a wall and other containers; a woman watching the action finds two Japanese letters painted in blood on the side of a cargo container.
 On a nighttime street people run out of a subway station and toward the audience screaming while a woman runs toward it until she sees villains with assault rifles and we hear a gun shoot off-screen; one of the villains grabs her and throws her to the platform floor where subway riders lie face down (no injuries are seen) until four silhouetted figures fight the villains, knock them unconscious and disappear; we see close-ups of rifles and swords and hear clinking metal, slaps, kicks and punches in addition to a few villains being thrown across the screen and landing on the platform (unconscious with no blood shown) while SWAT officers in cruisers with sirens blaring and lights flashing arrive to find the villains unconscious and hostages running away.
 A man says that he did not need many bullets to kill a woman's father, before picking up a handgun and firing at the woman and her male friend, but misses; the woman distracts the man with blasts from a dozen ceiling fire extinguishers while her friend knocks him unconscious with a heavy microscope from behind (the friend suffers a shoulder injury and later wears his arm in a sling).
 A scientist says that his father did not return from Vietnam and a Japanese warlord raised and trained him in martial arts; in a meeting with the warlord in a darkened dojo, the scientist agrees to help take over New York City via biogenic warfare whereupon the warlord says, "Tonight I dine on turtle soup"; the man gives the warlord shiny armor equipped with hundreds of blades on the shoulders, arms and legs (we see the blades extended at the hands and shoulders that look like sharp bird feathers); the warlord wears the armor in several scenes, stomping on challengers, sending knives flying across the screen and toward the audience and then retrieving the knives with electromagnets.
 A close-up shows a black-robed man from the back, kneeling in the darkness with his hands tied behind him as the back of his bald head sweats; he fights away multiple attackers with head-butts and kicking and sweeping foot action, breaks his bonds and criticizes his attackers as inept and causing the woman leader to tremble in fear (in shadows, we see that his face is heavily lined and scarred). Turtles are tasered with cattle prod size weapons several times (they yelp and chant "Pain is in the mind") in the rain and in a laboratory and enclose them in large glass cages with their arms chained to the walls. The turtles find a warehouse full of villains and escape hundreds of bullets by ducking behind a heavy metal door as it slides shut. A large armored warlord kicks a small woman in the stomach, throwing her and holding her stomach in pain. A woman falls, slammed to a floor in one short fight with a Turtle. A Turtle jumps through the wall of a van in which he rides, leaving a large hole.
 An extended high-speed chase occurs after four Turtles and two humans steal a semi-truck and are chased by villains in SUVs that launch spears on long cables: some SUVs crash into each other on a mountainside in snow and slide off a ledge (we see no injuries), and Turtles grasp cables and slide downhill fast in the snow on their shells in close-up and across the screen toward the audience while whooping; an SUV flips along its long axis several times toward the audience and another SUV hits the semi-truck with some cracking glass, a Turtle punches through an SUV roof and grabs the steering wheel, sending the vehicle off the mountain (no injuries are seen) and the truck driver stares at his female companion as he hits a large snowdrift causing the cab and trailer to detach and fall over an embankment, creaking loudly; the humans hang from a cliff ledge along with a Turtle as other Turtles pull them all back up to safety (the SUVs drivers are never seen on screen again). Turtles and a woman sit hunched inside a tower framework as it falls from a building and onto various signboards as it descends and sends up dust and sparks; two of the Turtles admit to fear and they all finally touch down without force on the sidewalk, unharmed.
 A woman climbs a fire escape and a metal ladder to a rooftop, where one of four Turtles lassoes her with a long chain and pulls her to the roof where the Turtles tell her not to mention them to anyone and they wipe her cell phone camera of any photos. A woman faints at the sight of the four Turtles and she awakens in the sewers of NYC where she meets a tall rat wearing a kimono; the Turtles bow to the woman after a rat/man tells them that she is a great guardian spirit.
 A flashback shows a man setting fire to a laboratory, tall flames rising from equipment and papers and we hear that he dies in the fire as we see the charred equipment and piles of ashes in the room. A rat/man lies under rubble in a sewer and is uncovered by a woman and a Turtle; he is gasping and weak until the Turtles inject him with a healing compound. Villains toss explosives into a sewer and we hear a muffled pop and see smoke, sparks and some light flashes (no injuries as the Turtles and a rat are thrown toward the camera).
 Line drawings of cardboard-like figures of humanoid turtles and karate villains dressed in black with black masks appear. A drawn human male figure lies in a street, reaching up to a villain that carries an assault rifle; the drawings end and weapons whose users are unseen swing through a dark room in which one small spotlight illuminates on each weapon as it appears; swords slice bricks, apples, and a watermelon in two while a long staff seems to swing itself.
 A flashback time-lapse scene shows a young girl releasing pet turtles and a rat into a storm drain and the animals grow and change into tall humanoids in the sewers; we hear that an injected mutation-causing chemical caused the transformation and can cause self-healing on a cellular level. Two flashbacks show small turtles being injected with an unknown substance (please see the Substance Use category for more details) and a tiny turtle's head butts his fish tank wall, cracking the glass.
 Four Turtles appear as muscular, hulking green male humanoids who carry weapons that include ninja swords, a Bo staff, nunchaku (nunchuks) and sais (handheld tridents) while they each sport a few slice-like scars on their lips, wear colorful masks and have large turtle shells on their backs; we hear that the humanoids resulted from a scientific experiment that caused a mutation in small box turtles.
 A man tells his assistants twice to draw all the blood out of four Turtles, even if it kills them, but the assistants do not succeed. Two Turtles bicker, argue and push each other throughout most of the film. A newspaper editor continually belittles a younger female reporter, calling her crazy and finally firing her.
 Four Turtles pull up to their human friend's new car while driving a new van and raising a rocket launcher to show off; it launches and blows up the new car in tall flames under a viaduct.
 Turtle men are shown sagging after a loss of blood and until a woman inputs a high dose of adrenalin into the computer that is somehow connected to their blood systems; they jump up, smash through glass walls with loud shattering and run to chase villains as one shouts, "We're bulletproof!" We see turtle blood flow through tubes and into a large centrifuge and distill into bright green biochemical mutagen.
 A rat knocks four Turtles down with his sweeping tail, then forces them to balance on one foot on things like wobbly chairs and tiny tricycles as they in turn balance raw eggs on sticks, pop a Ping-Pong ball continually on a paddle and do handstands (no injuries).
 A Turtle in a sewer flatulates as he practices martial arts routines and his brothers laugh. Four Turtles eat a large amount of pizza and flatulate. A woman abducted and covered with a smiley-face hood uncovers and says the sewers smell bad.

LANGUAGE 2 - 2 not fully enunciated scatological terms (we hear only the "sh"), 2 anatomical terms, name-calling (cowards, Batman, rat, crazy, insane, dumb-dumb, freak, stupid, little girl, human dirt), stereotypical references to men, women, teenagers, superheroes, karate masters, kung fu brotherhoods, villains, Asians, mad scientists, reporters, exclamations (Wow, Bam, Kowabunga, Shut-Up, Geez), 3 religious exclamations (e.g. Oh My God, Oh God).

SUBSTANCE USE - Two incense cones of an unknown substance burn in close-up briefly and we see wafting smoke, villains steal unknown biological chemicals from cargo containers (please see the Violence/Gore category for more details), high doses of adrenalin cause four Turtles to chatter quickly and gesture wildly as well as run and jump and roll, two flashbacks show small turtles injected with an unknown liquid, a centrifuge distills turtle blood into a green chemical substance containing a mutation agent, and Turtles say they have injected a rat/man with a healing compound (we do not see it). A blurry banquet scene features tall glasses of dark and clear beverages (possibly alcohol) on tables; no one is shown drinking.

DISCUSSION TOPICS - Power, corruption, greed, control, competition, death, family, friendship, loyalty, sacrifice, courage, determination, conflict and resolution, men hurting small women.

MESSAGE - Family loyalty can defeat villainy.

CAVEATS

Be aware that while we do our best to avoid spoilers it is impossible to disguise all details and some may reveal crucial plot elements.

We've gone through several editorial changes since we started covering films in 1992 and older reviews are not as complete & accurate as recent ones; we plan to revisit and correct older reviews as resources and time permits.

Our ratings and reviews are based on the theatrically-released versions of films; on video there are often Unrated, Special, Director's Cut or Extended versions, (usually accurately labelled but sometimes mislabeled) released that contain additional content, which we did not review.


how to
support us

PLEASE DONATE

We are a totally independent website with no connections to political, religious or other groups & we neither solicit nor choose advertisers. You can help us keep our independence with a donation.

NO MORE ADS!

Become a member of our premium site for just $1/month & access advance reviews, without any ads, not a single one, ever. And you will be helping support our website & our efforts.

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

We welcome suggestions & criticisms -- and we accept compliments too. While we read all emails & try to reply we don't always manage to do so; be assured that we will not share your e-mail address.

how to
support us

PLEASE DONATE

We are a totally independent website with no connections to political, religious or other groups & we neither solicit nor choose advertisers. You can help us keep our independence with a donation.

NO MORE ADS!

Become a member of our premium site for just $2/month & access advance reviews, without any ads, not a single one, ever. And you will be helping support our website & our efforts.

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

We welcome suggestions & criticisms -- and we will accept compliments too. While we read all emails & try to reply we do not always manage to do so; be assured that we will not share your e-mail address.

Subscribe to our newsletter

Subscribe to our newsletter

Know when new reviews are published
We will never sell or share your email address with anybody and you can unsubscribe at any time

You're all set! Please check your email for confirmation.

Pin It on Pinterest

Share This