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Baywatch | 2017 | R | - 7.7.10
The lieutenant of the bay watch patrol (Dwayne Johnson) is hindered by funding cuts, a brash recruit (Zac Efron), and city corruption as he and his team of lifeguards struggle to keep beach visitors safe from riptides, sharks, venomous sea creatures and illegal drugs. Also with Priyanka Chopra, Alexandra Daddario, Kelly Rohrbach, Ilfenesh Hadera and Jon Bash. Directed by Seth Gordon. A few lines of dialogue are in Spanish and beach slang with English subtitles. [1:59]
SEX/NUDITY 7 - In a morgue, a man tells another man to examine a body's genitals and we see the penis shaft and head, testicles, and pubic hair as the second man pulls them up and the first man takes a picture of the other man and laughs. On a beach an erection outline shows in a man's pants as a woman gives him the Heimlich maneuver and we see her buttocks in close-up as her abdomen and groin bounce off his buttocks several times; he falls onto boards nailed together and we see the outline of his testicles and scrotum stuck between two boards until a man helps him stand and other men and women take pictures of his genitals, which are below the frame.
► In a shower scene, a man is shown from his navel to his head in the front and in full back nudity (bare chest, abdomen, buttocks, back and legs are seen); a woman tells him the showers are co-ed and that they all wear thong panties in it as she looks down at his crotch (we do not see anything) and says, "Foot longs for lunch." A man looks at a bikini-clad woman on the beach with binoculars.
► Women wear one-piece swim suits that are un-zipped to the lower chest, revealing large cleavage with the leg openings cut almost to the waist (showing hips with the pubic area covered by a very narrow thong-like portion of the suit (no hair shows); buttocks are partially bare and jiggle when the women walk or run. A close-up shows a woman's buttocks covered by a tight bikini as it jiggles. A woman's buttocks covered by loose pajama short-shorts appear and she reaches back and slaps herself as she walks away. A few scenes feature breasts jiggling in bikini tops as a woman runs by, and in a knit cutoff top as a woman bounces on her toes. A man in disguise wears a woman's wig and high heels with a sleeveless mini-dress with a hemline that barely covers his crotch as he tries to pull it down unsuccessfully. A man wears knee-length shorts as he moves through an upper body obstacle course, flexing his arm and chest muscles and people take pictures. We see a muscular man with a large circular tattoo across one shoulder and pectoral area, flexing arm and chest muscles as he and another man carry barbells on their back, on which large refrigerators are attached to each end; they then do chin-ups and flex muscles side by side as the sequence ends. Half a dozen scenes include a woman wearing clingy jersey dresses that reveal large cleavage and in one scene, and we see a close-up of her cleavage. We see a close-up of large cleavage above a tube top under a jacket. Two party scenes show women wearing mini-dresses that are low-cut to above the navel or have cut-outs that reveal cleavage and bare sides and backs. A woman wears a top that has lace from the neckline to her shoulders and a very tight mini skirt split up both thighs and inset with lace (we see large cleavage and abdomen. A woman wears a sleeveless, clingy mini-dress with a high neckline and a hemline reaching only to her crotch. A man pulls off his shirt to reveal thick hair around his nipples and in a narrow strip down his lower chest and abdomen. Several men are shirtless on the beach showing bare chests and backs, and lower legs below knee length shorts.
► A man and a woman kiss passionately in a store room. A man and a woman kiss for several seconds on a yacht. A man and a woman are shown in her apartment in a morning scene; he is sleeping on the couch and she is wearing skimpy pajama shorts and top (sex is implied). A man in a club dances awkwardly, grabs his groin, twerks against a woman's long skirt, and then gets onto all fours and thrusts his pelvis toward the floor.
► A man says that a man who is an Olympic medalist is a sex symbol. A man says that a woman's attractive figure makes him believe in God. A man looks at an attractive woman and can speak only nonsense syllables.
VIOLENCE/GORE 7 - Two men spread sloppy fish entrails down into a man's scuba top on his back and toss him into a bay; we later see four Coast Guard men pull the body out of the water with one arm missing and revealing a bone stub and swollen tissue at one shoulder, and we see photos of the body later with bite marks and knife cuts visible at the top of the shoulders and we hear the death was murder. A man on a pier fires fireworks at a woman, exploding her high into the air (she disappears); a burst of lights go off and a bloody ankle and foot fall onto a man as he screeches.
► A yacht catches fire in the middle of a bay, spewing smoke and flames as two women scream and one calls a lifeguard; three men and three women rush to the yacht on jet skis and a boat and two men dive through flames and burning fuel on the water's surface; one man becomes confused and a woman pulls him out onto the boat, where he coughs up water as the other man boards the yacht, walks through a cabin in flames where we hear screams off-camera, and tosses two women off the yacht to safety on the other boat as fire shoots out from the yacht window and it explodes; we later see a body on the beach on a gurney covered with a sheet.
► A woman shoots and kills a man, she shoots again as a man slaps her hand to make her miss her target, and then grabs a lifeguard and holds a gun to his head. A man on a pier is shot in the shoulder and we see a wet spot on his shirt as he falls into the water and we later see a woman hold gauze over the wound.
► Two teen girls and a teen boy fall into a bay from a pier and lose consciousness; two men and a woman jump in to help, one of the men steals a motor cycle and speeds on a boardwalk, knocks screaming people down, and jumps off the cycle; the cycle man grabs one girl, who punches him and hits his face with her elbow, but he gets her to shore where he tries CPR, but a woman stops him and pulls out a long strand of seaweed from the girl's throat, allowing the girl to breathe normally; the other rescuers pull the other teens out of the water and we see the boy unconscious, but he coughs up water after a few seconds and revives.
► While parasailing, a man falls into a bay and another man pulls him out and carries him, unconscious and with blood on his temple and face.
► A gunman points a pistol at a man and punches him in the face, and then shoots at and misses another man. A woman holds a pistol between the eyes of a man, but does not shoot. A man threatens another man with a gun as a woman argues to teach the intended victim manners; the scene ends with the death of the victim implied. Two men on jet skis ride over other jet skiing people, jump a ramp and are caught in a large net; they run into a house and fistfight until one man strangles the other man with a hanging mobile and it breaks; the second man slams a diaper bin over the other man's head and pushes him out a first-floor window and into the pool beside the house. A man punches another man, who drops a pistol. A woman on a yacht hits a man on the head with a fire extinguisher and the victim falls unconscious. Men tie up and gag a man and put him into a shark cage on a yacht, and then push him into the sea where he becomes semi-conscious and sees a vision of a woman that he kisses, but he sees that it is a muscular man and awakens. A man tackles another man who is stealing purses on a beach and the thief escapes. A woman steps on a man's instep with a long spike heel and he grimaces.
► Two men and a woman break into a morgue and hide inside refrigerated body drawers where fat from a body in the slot above drips onto a man's face and into his mouth and he screams, jumps out of the drawer and pours hand sanitizer into his mouth and spits it out (we see it).
► We see a few large spiky sea urchins on a beach and along a pier and we hear that they are venomous and cause an adrenalin rush before the venom kills humans; a man on a pier pulls one off the back of his neck and we see a woman injecting him in close-up with a large syringe of anti-venom. A man screams as he slaps a few small jellyfish off his scuba suit on a beach.
► Lifeguard tryouts participants swim and perform over an obstacle course as others scream at them over megaphones. We hear that a man is on probation for an unknown crime.
► A man vomits reddish material into a pool in a swimming event. A man vomits reddish-brown material into a swimming pool at a bar. A man wakes one morning with slobber on his cheek and wipes it away with his hand. A man gags at a photo of a man with a bloody shark-bite out of his shoulder, but does not vomit. A man chokes on a chip and spits it out during a Heimlich maneuver.
LANGUAGE 10 - About 75 F-words and its derivatives, 1 obscene hand gesture, 6 sexual references, 24 scatological terms, 33 anatomical terms, 11 mild obscenities, name-calling (crazy, stupid, dumb, idiots, cocky, reckless, swim-happy white people, blue-eyed demon, chicken legs, nozzle chin, Creepy Creeperton, Dumb Dumb), exclamations (I swear, shut-up, heck), 4 religious profanities (GD), 35 religious exclamations (e.g. Oh My God, Oh God, God Help Us, Holy Christ, For Christ's Sake, Holy [scatological term deleted], Thank God, Jesus Christ, Jesus).
SUBSTANCE USE - A young boy picks up a small plastic bag of drugs on a beach and gives it to a lifeguard who tells his colleagues that it is a drug like "bath salts" on meth, a man reaches into sand and picks up a small empty plastic bag that had contained a drug, a man empties a large bag of a drug into a container where we see small white cubes, a man dives under a yacht and opens a floor plate to reveal many plastic bricks of a drug in the belly of the boat and when he cuts open one brick flakes of the drug float into the water, a woman has a small baggie of a drug stuck into the hip opening of her bikini bottom, a man says that two women are high (we do not see this), and a man says that he is high from sea urchin venom and he falls unconscious. Liquid in an untouched Martini glass and wine glass on a table looks like water, a wine bottle is shown in an ice bucket in the background of a shot, a man drinks from a can whose label is obscured (could be beer), a man chugs whiskey from a bottle and falls into a pool, men and women drink champagne and wine as well as cocktails and whiskey at a club and at a party, a man drinks several glasses whiskey at a club, and another man at a club chugs two double shots of liquor.
DISCUSSION TOPICS - Drug trafficking, blackmail, land grabs, murder, bribery, corrupt law enforcement, water safety, dangerous sea animals, mentoring, effort, making mistakes, loyalty, trust, respect, determination, courage, duty, justice, family.
MESSAGE - Lifeguards can save lives, help the Coast Guard, and prevent crime on American shorelines. All popular TV shows eventually become feature films.
CAVEATS
Be aware that while we do our best to avoid spoilers it is impossible to disguise all details and some may reveal crucial plot elements.
We've gone through several editorial changes since we started covering films in 1992 and older reviews are not as complete & accurate as recent ones; we plan to revisit and correct older reviews as resources and time permits.
Our ratings and reviews are based on the theatrically-released versions of films; on video there are often Unrated, Special, Director's Cut or Extended versions, (usually accurately labelled but sometimes mislabeled) released that contain additional content, which we did not review.
Gladiator II - 2.7.2
Wicked: Part I - 3.4.2
Bonhoeffer: Pastor. Spy. Assassin. - 1.5.3
Emilia Pérez - 6.6.7
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