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The Three Stooges | 2012 | PG | - 2.4.2

Based on the TV series: Three friends, Larry, Curly and Moe, start their relationship as toddlers in an orphanage and remain together, living and working until they learn one day that the orphanage will close unless they can raise $830,000. They head to the big city where they hope to save the day and are convinced to help a woman kill her husband for exactly the amount that they need. Also with Sean Hayes, Will Sasso, Chris Diamantopoulos, Jane Lynch, Sofia Vergara and Jennifer Hudson. Directed by Bobby & Peter Farrelly. [1:35]

SEX/NUDITY 2 - A nun is shown wearing a skimpy swimsuit that reveals cleavage, bare abdomen and legs. A woman is shown in several scenes wearing low-cut and tight-fitting outfits that reveal cleavage and accentuate her figure. A man is shown without a shirt at the end of the film and his bare chest and abdomen are seen. Many infants are shown without shirts. Two men are shown dressed like women.
 A peanut is thrown and strikes a lion in the testicles (we see a close-up shot).
 A man and a married woman are shown hugging in a hotel room and the man kisses the woman's neck. A woman kisses a man on the cheek. A man caresses the arm of a man dressed like a woman and invites him out for a meal (the man dressed like a woman punches him).
 A woman refers to another woman as barren.


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VIOLENCE/GORE 4 - The cartoonish violence is played for laughs and the filmmakers make an appearance at the end of the film to explain that the tools used to hit each other were made of rubber; they demonstrate how the hitting was performed safely.
 A nun hits the legs out from under a bed where three men are sleeping, the bed collapses, the men fall on the floor, the nun threatens the men with a piece of wood until one of the men lunges at her and she grabs and squeezes his hand (we hear cracking of bones and he yelps). A large bell falls off a roof and strikes a nun standing on the ground; the nun falls to the ground unconscious, two men that are also on the roof fall and land on the nun, they drag the nun and hit her head on a fire hydrant, another man falls off the roof and lands on her, a man pours a bucket of water on her face and a sledgehammer head inside the bucket hits her in the face (she is seen unharmed later). A nun is struck in the head by a diving board and falls into a swimming pool (she is shown to be OK as she yells). A nun is shown strapped to a table while three boys prepare to remove a tooth; the nun moans and pleads with them until one boy strikes her in the head with a croquet mallet and she falls unconscious.
 A man is used as a battering ram and his head is smashed into a door several times (he is not harmed although he complains that the two men holding him are squeezing his ankles too tight). A man hits another man in the head with a hammer and he holds his head and complains of a headache coming on. A man hits another man on top of the head and under the chin causing the man to bite his tongue. A man strikes another man in the head with a sledgehammer. A man is struck in the face with a sledgehammer and then slapped in the face. A boy pulls a clump of hair out of another boy's head and nostril hairs from another boy's nostril. A large duffel bag is tossed out of a speeding car and it lands on the doorstep of an orphanage; when a nun unzips the bag, she is poked in the eyes and she falls back over a banister and into a flower bed (we see her unharmed later). Numerous scenes throughout the movie contain poking, slapping, flicking noses and banging heads together among three boys and then three men. A man presses a spinning saw against another man's head (he screams) and we see the teeth of the blade twist and sparks fly (the man is uninjured). A man with a saw nearly hits another man with it. A man squishes two donuts into another man's ears. A man slaps three other men in the face numerous times. A man stomps on another man's foot (we hear a crunch but he seems fine). A man puts his hand in another man's mouth and puts his fingers in another man's nose and then pulls them both along with him. We hear punching and a commotion coming form inside a room, the door opens and a man tries to crawl out until a woman grabs him and pulls him back inside. A man rips eyelashes out of another man's eyelids and presses them onto another man's eyelids. A man on a ladder falls after the ladder is struck by a golf cart, and he falls on top of several nuns; three other men attack the man, they punch and kick him, pull his shirt up and rip hair out of his arm pits, knock him to the ground and jump on him. Three men grab a fire hose and jump off a roof; they crash onto a canopy and land hard on the ground where they knock over another man (no one appears injured). Three men are thrown over a wall and land on top of each other on the other side (they are OK). Three men on a bike are pulled behind a truck; they fall over and are dragged on their side down the road. Three men hold onto the bumper of a car and are dragged (we see their shows smoldering when the car stops). A man drags a running saw up a ladder and the spinning blade cuts the rungs as he climbs up. A man shoots an arrow into the sky and says, "In the wrong hands, this thing could be dangerous." A man throws himself on the ground and spins around in a couple of scenes. Three men are chased by police, one officer corners them, they poke him, pull up his shirt and kick him (we see him lying motionless on the ground). A woman helps a man climb over a wall and the man steps on her breast and then her face. Three men crash into another man and they all fall into a flowerbed.
 A young girl floats to the ceiling of a tent while holding a bunch of balloons, a man shoots the balloons using a shotgun and the girl falls into a cake (she is unharmed). A man holds a gun on another man, and a third man then holds a gun on the first man.
 Three men run into a busy street and are nearly hit by a car. Three men argue and fight on a stage: they hit each other, one man is knocked back into a metal pillar, two men are struck with a pulley on a rope, and one man pulls out a tuft of another man's hair. A man staples a flyer to another man's head (he complains but seems fine). We see a man putting a curling iron on a woman's tongue and she is screaming. A man puts a microwave over another man's head and turns it on (the man's eyes are shown bulging out). A man uses a cheese grater on another man (we don't see damage). A man throws a rat into a woman's cleavage, and she screams causing the driver of the car they are in to swerve, drive off the road and submerge in water; they struggle to breathe, one of the men in the car flatulates, another lights a match and causes an explosion and they all swim to shore safely (we see a couple of the people with char on their faces).
 A man is shoved in front of a bus, he is struck and thrown across the road, he is dragged and spun under a road cleaning machine brush, and then thrown back into the road where he is pounced on by a pogo stick and stabbed in the leg with an arrow (we see his face is bruised and he yells). A stick of dynamite is placed inside a man's body cast, it explodes and we see his face charred.
 A man falls over a wall and lands in a lion's den in a zoo; the lion snarls and growls, lunges at him and is pulled back by a chain, the man slaps the lion and teases it, a peanut is thrown and strikes the lion in the testicles (we see a close-up shot), it roars and pulls free of his restraint and attacks the man (we hear the man yell but do not see the attack and we see the man with a large scratch on his face later). A man's head is dunked into a fish tank, he pulls his head out and a lobster is clamped onto his ears; the lobster is pulled off the man's face and put down another man's pants where we hear clamping and crunching while the man yells. An octopus is thrown and lands on a man's face and another man hits the man in the face with a shovel to try to remove it.
 Three men are chased through a hospital by a police officer: the officer is tripped, he hits his head on an ironing board, falls to the floor unconscious, the three men use two hot irons as if they are defibrillators and press them on his chest and the man sits up and screams (we hear a sizzle and see smoke coming from his chest).
 Two men in full body casts are shown in a hospital (they both have heavily bruised faces and eyes and one has his mouth wired shut). We see a nun with a cast on her arm and a bandage on her nose along with another nun who appears very nervous while they talk about three boys who are apparently responsible for their condition. A man grabs his chest and tells three other men that he is dying and that they should kill him by smothering him with a pillow.
 Three men attempt to change the diapers of many infants in a hospital nursery; they are each sprayed in the face by urine when they remove the diapers (they are drenched) and they then use the infants as weapons to have them spray urine on each other. An infant is slid across a floor in a hospital nursery.
 A man is shown swimming with a polar bear and catching a fish in his mouth, then swimming away in a hurry when the bear swims toward him. A man eats a fish (we see the bones and a head). We see many fish floundering on the ground as a man sprinkles them each with water (they are starting a fish farm); one fish is shown motionless and flies buzz around it (it appears to be dead). A man throws a peanut into the blowhole of a dolphin; the dolphin appears to be suffocating so the man performs the Heimlich maneuver and the nut is shot out of the hole.
 A woman asks three men to kill her husband for money. A young girl describes how a young boy watched his parents drown and then his brother being "dragged away kicking and screaming." A man says that his mother died in a hunting accident. A man describes a "sick kid getting fitted for angel wings." A woman yells at three men. A nun yells at children playing kick the can and ends by saying, "No wonder your parents didn't want you." A nun tells another nun to throws three boys "some chew toys." A nun talks about a fishing boat crewmember being eaten by a shark. A boy growls at another boy. A man says, "Remind me to gouge your eyes out later" to another man. A man says, "We'll forge checks." Three women scream when they see a rat.
 A man and a married woman plan the murder of her husband to get his money. A young girl is shown in bed and she looks very sick; we are told that she will not get better because they have no health insurance.
 A young boy tells a young girl that he got the cheese cubes she is eating from rattraps in the attic and the girl spits the cheese out. A woman spits toothpaste in a man's face when she is surprised by something he says. A man plays with a rat in several scenes. A man sticks his finger in bowl of dip twice at a party.


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LANGUAGE 2 - Name-calling (hairy penguin, no good lazy bums, idiot, wuss, legs, dim of wit, mutton head, monkey face, stretched out meatball, mook, you have rocks in your head, jumbotron, monster, water weasels, butter bean, rude, wombats, blithering idiots, 3PO, crusher), exclamations (shut up, goodness, back off), 6 religious exclamations.


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SUBSTANCE USE - A man says, "Fosters is Australian for beer," people are shown at a party drinking what looks like alcoholic beverages, a man drinks from a champagne fountain, and a man drinks from a punch bowl.


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DISCUSSION TOPICS - Orphanages, foster homes, friendship, mischief makers, pride, greed.

MESSAGE - Don't try this at home.

CAVEATS

Be aware that while we do our best to avoid spoilers it is impossible to disguise all details and some may reveal crucial plot elements.

We've gone through several editorial changes since we started covering films in 1992 and older reviews are not as complete & accurate as recent ones; we plan to revisit and correct older reviews as resources and time permits.

Our ratings and reviews are based on the theatrically-released versions of films; on video there are often Unrated, Special, Director's Cut or Extended versions, (usually accurately labelled but sometimes mislabeled) released that contain additional content, which we did not review.


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