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The Amityville Horror | 2005 | R | - 6.9.5
Re-make of the 1970's horror classic involving an apparently haunted house in Amityville, Long Island. The previous owners of the house were murdered by their eldest son, who claimed to be hearing voices that told him to kill his family. Now, a new family (Ryan Reynolds, Melissa George, Jimmy Bennett, Jesse James and Rachel Nichols), unaware of the house's history, buys it, and not long after they arrive very strange and creepy things begin to go violently bump mostly in the night. Directed by Andrew Douglas. [1:40]
SEX/NUDITY 6 - A woman takes off her nightgown (we see her in panties from the back, her bare back and lower buttock), she climbs into bed with her husband, they kiss, and she sits on top of him (we see her bare back and buttocks) and begins to thrust (they both moan).
► A teenage girl wearing a low-cut, short top and low-cut pants that reveal cleavage, bare abdomen and back, lies in a teenage boy's bed and asks him if he "frenches"; then she describes that it means a certain kind of kiss, and she leans over toward him while he backs away.
► A woman wears low-cut tops and dresses that reveal cleavage, bare back and shoulders. A man is bare-chested in many scenes. A teenage boy admires a teenage girl wearing a low-cut, short top and low-cut pants that reveal cleavage, bare abdomen and back.
► A woman squeezes her husband's buttock. A woman dances and a video camera that's filming her focuses on her buttocks and hips.
► A man and a woman snuggle in bed and kiss, and a man and a woman kiss in several scenes.
VIOLENCE/GORE 9 - A man walks through a hidden room, past cages where people are being held and tortured: one man lunges toward him and we see his bloody face and what looks like his tongue being pulled out, another man hangs from hooks in his skin, another man has a very bloody face and mouth and has a chain around his neck, and another man slits his own throat, and blood sprays another man and completely covers him; we hear about bodies of the tortured being found in a lake.
► A man loads a shotgun, shoots a woman sleeping in bed (her hair flutters, and blood and matter spray out of her head), and shoots the man sleeping next to her in the back (we see blood soak into his pajama top); we then see a sleeping child shot in the back and then another, and a young girl hides in a closet, the man opens the door, takes aim and fires (we hear the shot and see a flash of light but do not see the girl being hit).
► A man with an ax follows a barking dog into a boat shed, the man hears the dog snarling in the dark, the man sees something lunging toward him, he swings the ax several times, blood splatters, and we hear squishing and see a blood-covered dog lying on the floor.
► A man has many vivid nightmares: One shows him shooting himself in the head (blood and matter splatter), one shows him discovering a wounded person (we see a lot of blood on a wound on his back) and when the man touches the wounded person he lifts his head and we see a very bloody face and mouth. A man who is tied up and unconscious imagines many horrific scenes with blood splattering, people being killed in gruesome ways, shooting himself, and blood pouring over him.
► A teenage girl goes into a closet, the door closes behind her and will not open; she pulls on the door and yells for help, blood drips from the ceiling light bulb, she hears a voice, she turns and sees the corpse of a young girl with a hole in her forehead: the corpse takes the teenage girl's hand and puts her finger into the hole in her forehead (we hear squishing, see the bloody bullet hole and blood on her hands), the teenage girl screams, paws at the door and we then see her quaking and muttering on a stretcher. A man sees the corpse of a young girl standing on the foot of his bed (the corpse is grey-tinged with a bullet hole through her forehead) and with a rope around her neck.
► A man climbs into a bathtub filled with water, closes his eyes and two arms reach up from under him, grab him and hold him under the water; he struggles, knocks his head and his wife comes in to help him (he has blood on his head).
► The corpse of a man (his skin is discolored and his mouth is very bloody) appears behind a young boy (the boy cannot see it) who's trying to wash his hands, and blood begins to drip from the faucet. A man goes into a closet and we see (he does not) the corpse of a young girl being held to the ceiling by arms coming through the ceiling (the arms are not attached to a body); she flails and one hand covers her mouth. The corpse of a girl screams, inanimate objects in a house begin to move around on their own, and then the girl is pulled down through the floor. A man watches home movies and the faces of the people in the movies become distorted and decayed.
► We hear a deep and ghoulish voice repeating the phrase "Catch 'em, kill 'em" throughout the movie. A woman hears a noise in a house, we see figures moving behind her and we see magnetic letters move on a refrigerator door to spell out "katch 'em, kill 'em" [sic]. We hear news reports and see police crime scene photographs of the murders of eight people (the photos show the dead bodies with bloody wounds). A teenage girl recounts stories of the murders that were committed in a house: first it was the family dog, and then the rest of the family; we see flashes of the crime scene images of the bloody bodies.
► A priest begins to perform an exorcism in a house, holy water sizzles as it touches the floor, the door of the room he is in slams shut, he hears sounds coming from vents, he goes close to one, and a swarm of flies attacks him (his face is covered with them) and we hear a booming voice saying "get out," and he runs in fear.
► A woman falls in a lake behind a boat, her hair gets caught in the spinning propeller, she is held under water while her face turns decayed and skeletal, and a man on the boat watches with interest but does not hurry to save her; she eventually frees herself and runs away.
► A man comes up from a basement carrying a gun, pushes through a blocked door, grabs a woman by the throat, slams her against a wall twice, a teenage boy hits the man from behind, and the man hits the boy twice; the family gets away, runs up the stairs, climbs out a window and across a roof, while the man fires the gun through the roof nearly hitting a woman. The man climbs out, a boy hits the man with a metal pipe, and the man slides down the roof and lands hard on the ground.
► A man picks up an ax, grabs a boy (his face turns decayed and skeletal) and prepares to hit him with it; a woman holds a gun to the man's head, drops it and then when the man prepares to swing the ax at the boy again, she hits him on the back of the head with the gun, and he falls to the ground unconscious. The man imagines hitting the woman in the stomach with the ax (she gasps and falls to the ground), the woman hits the man in the face with the gun knocking him out again, and he is tied up and dragged to a boat.
► A young girl walks along the peak of a rooftop, gets to the end and falls off; her mother has climbed up with her and catches her, the girl dangles, the mother slips down the roof, slams into a pipe, and drops the girl and a man below catches her.
► A man forces a teenage boy to hold a log while the man chops it; he does this twice and the boy is badly shaken since the ax comes very close to him both times. A man hears the barking of a dog that is dead, he appears shaken, yells and collapses. A dog digs at a floor and wall frantically, and a man chops wood violently.
► A man and a woman frantically look for their young daughter, they find her standing on the stem of a boat and panic to think that she might fall into the water. A man jumps into water thinking that his daughter has fallen in but finds nothing.
► A man yells at his family and acts in a threatening manner in many scenes (the family members appear afraid). A woman yells at her daughter after she did something very dangerous, a man yells at his children and accuses them of pulling a prank on their babysitter, and a man and a woman yell at each other.
► We hear a noise in a house and see a shadow dart by in a hallway. A man goes into a basement, he hears noises and what sounds like whispering voices.
► A man squeezes a woman's hand hard (she grimaces), and a man squeezes a young girl's cheeks in a threatening manner.
► A young boy urinates in a toilet (we hear trickle and see him shake when he's finished). A man breaks a wall down with a sledgehammer, he reaches around a beam to pull on it, his hand is covered with sticky slime and we see slithering maggots. A man looks very ill; his skin is pale, he has dark circles under his eyes, and his eyes are extremely bloodshot and we see him vomiting (we see goo).
LANGUAGE 5 - 5 F-words, 2 sexual references, 6 scatological terms (3 mild), 1 anatomical term, 5 mild obscenities, name-calling (stupid, jerk), 8 religious profanities.
SUBSTANCE USE - A man and a woman are shown drinking wine with dinner at a restaurant. A teenage babysitter smokes marijuana while babysitting.
DISCUSSION TOPICS - Murder, mental illness, the American dream, haunted houses, death of a parent, death of a spouse, imaginary friends, desperation, evil, exorcisms, adjusting to a new life, torture, treatment of Native Americans.
MESSAGE - What you think is a dream come true may turn out to be your worst nightmare.
CAVEATS
Be aware that while we do our best to avoid spoilers it is impossible to disguise all details and some may reveal crucial plot elements.
We've gone through several editorial changes since we started covering films in 1992 and older reviews are not as complete & accurate as recent ones; we plan to revisit and correct older reviews as resources and time permits.
Our ratings and reviews are based on the theatrically-released versions of films; on video there are often Unrated, Special, Director's Cut or Extended versions, (usually accurately labelled but sometimes mislabeled) released that contain additional content, which we did not review.
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